just as we post our review of
Eight, good news jumps right at us. The Hollywood
Reporter tells us that Comedy Central is making an HD
version of the South Park
episode Good Times with Weapons
available on the Xbox 360 (via Xbox Live). You can download it for
free starting today and until March 20. Then from March 20th and up
until April 3rd, if you buy a 360 from Best Buy, you'll get a free
HD-DVD of the episode with the console. Pretty sweet, if you ask me.
I guess that means we can expect HD versions of later season sets
With the good news, out of the way, let's dive into Season
Seven in our backwards look at the show.
Park: The Complete Seventh Season
2004 (2006) - Comedy Central (Paramount)
Kripples, Toilet Paper,
I'm a Little Bit Country,
Fat Butt and Pancake Head,
Lil' Crime Stoppers, Red
Man's Greed, South Park Is
Gay!, Christian Rock Hard,
Grey Dawn, Casa
Bonita, All About the
Mormons?, Butt Out,
Christmas in Canada
This was a hard season to nail down to just five. I liked a lot
of these. But since I have to, here goes...
The Top Five
Cancelled: Fulfilling a
promise made during a commercial break from Season
Six's Free Hat
episode, Cancelled begins
with a remastered, almost shot-for-shot remake of the first
episode Cartman Gets an Anal Probe.
the help of Chef and a scientist named Jeff (not so loosely based on
Jeff Goldblum's character from ID4,
who makes idiotic yet accurate leaps in logic), the kids learn that
the anal probe in Cartman's ass is actually a satellite beaming a
reality show called "Earth". The grey Visitors responsible
show up, abduct the kids and bring them to their headquarters of
their broadcast station, where they learn that "Earth" has
been cancelled because humans now know they're on camera. With no
choice, the kids head to the planet Fognl to talk the media masters
of the universe, the Joozians, and get them to change their minds.
Will they be successful? Find out here. Best moment: the cycling
through of friendly faces the boys can identify with, ending up as a
taco that shits ice cream.
Fat Butt and Pancake Head:
This is probably one of the best episodes ever. I swear, I laugh
every single time I hear the words taco and/or burrito thanks to
this episode. Tasked with giving special reports on cultural
diversity, Kyle and Cartman each give a speech. Kyle's is thoughtful
and informative. Cartman's is a hand puppet made to look like
Jennifer Lopez (pronounced Yenifer, as she can't pronounce J's in
Cartman's impersonation), who sings about eating tacos and burritos.
The crowd and the judges go crazy and award him their highest price:
a $20 gift card good at the local mall. Kyle is furious, but Cartman
insists, unlike every other time he's tried to pull one over on
them, that his hand is truly possessed. "Yenifer" talks
Cartman into spending the money on a music video for her new song Taco
Flavored Kisses. Once finished, the video makes its way to the
music industry where Jennifer Lopez's real agent hears it. Of
course, he loves it and fires JLo and rushes to sign up "Yenifer."
Naturally, JLo doesn't take any of this lying down and heads down to
South Park personally to let the new young thing know who's boss.
That's when JLo's beau, Ben Affleck, lays his eyes on the new Jen
and falls in love. I could go on, but I won't. See... Ben Affleck
make love to "Yenifer"! Marvel... at the vocal stylings of
a little boys hand! Gasp... at the true identity of Yenifer!
Just who is Mitch Conner, and will he ever dream again?
South Park Is Gay!:
Metrosexuals. Gotta love 'em. What to say, what to say. Uhm, okay...
this one is simple and easy to narrow down. Two words - Crab People!
All About Mormons?: A new kid
(Gary) and his family arrive in South Park and, because he's so damn
nice, the kids send Stan to beat him up. But instead of a fight,
Stan gets a dinner invite, where he learns that Gary and his family
are Mormons and sincerely nice people. When Stan discusses what he
learned about The Church of Latter Day Saints with HIS family, his
father gets pissed off because he thinks they're trying to convert
him. Of course, after he shows up to kick Gary's father's ass, he
learns about LDS and how goddamn nice the family is, bringing his
family into his new found religion. At the end of the day, Stan
confronts everyone about the nonsensical history of LDS and how
there's not a lick of empirical proof defending the religion. The
humor comes out of the segues the story takes when the Mormon family
tells the stories, and the sing-song narrator framing each story. In
the end, I think I truly appreciate the humor of this episode
because I had a friend who was a Mormon and, though he thought I was
making fun of him, I asked a lot of questions about his religion and
genuinely learned a bunch about the church and the people in it.
Gary's speech to Stan at the end makes a lot of sense and could
stand in for any religious person who's just trying to be nice.
Raisins: The concept here is
the best part... a Hooters-like bar for kids with little girls
exploiting their budding sexuality. But ultimately the episode is
about love. Stan loses Wendy and turns Goth because of it. And
Butters falls in love with a waitress named Lexus only to have his
heart torn in twain (haven't we all). There are a million jokes
here, but Raisins ends up one
of the funniest character study episodes of the season and one of my
favorite... but not near as favorite as...
Casa Bonita: It's Kyle's
birthday and he has four tickets to Colorado's premier Mexican
Bonita. Everyone is excited, most of all Cartman. But Kyle has
some bad news: Because of all the taunting and anti-Semitism,
Cartman is not invited. Butters will be going in his place. Cartman
of course hatches a plan. He tricks Butters into thinking a meteor
has hit the Earth and hides him away. Kyle, distraught that his
friend is missing, cancels the trip and Cartman has to make Butters
believe all humanity is lost. Setting up him as the last man on
Earth, Butters now lives in a junk yard. Cartman gets his wish and
goes with the boys to Casa Bonita in place of the lost Butters, but
en route, Butters is found and Kyle's parents are alerted that
Cartman is being looked for in connection with the abduction. It's a
mad dash as Cartman runs through Casa Bonita, reliving all the fun
he has had in the past as the police case him through the
restaurant. It ends with a jump off a cliff and the acknowledgment
that all the scheming and manipulation was totally worth it. Next
time I'm in Colorado, I'm so going to Casa Bonita.
For those who worry about such things, the video and audio quality
on these discs is about the same as Season
Eight. Also included are the usual mini-commentaries by
Matt and Trey. That's it for this volume.
Program Rating: B+
Disc Rating (Video/Audio/Extras): B+/B-/D
Atlanta, GA 3/6/07